Sunday, January 13, 2013

Tunnel Vision

I started a new job this past week. Every day had constant work, fast pace schedules, and influxes of new information. I was traveling down the the work tunnel.

At the same time I found this tunnel to be a distraction. It occurred to me just how distracted I had been when I was falling apart at the drop of a hat and shouting at my poor husband A for absolutely nothing that he had inflicted.

Mid freak out I had no idea what my problem was. I had a great week. I was happy to be settling back into the swing of things. I've been catching up with friends and learning my new job.

It turns out that my focused energy on work and orderly life was really just a distraction from dealing with my emotions. Feelings about being home and then leaving again. Feelings about this next phase in my life and in my marriage. Feelings about distance between me and all these people I love. Feelings about my purpose here and how I'm meant to have an impact.

All and all the freak out was welcome and necessary. I know I can't ignore these feelings. I have to find balance in doing my work in a focused fashion without tunneling into a falsely perfect life. Life is not perfect and tunnel vision is only a distraction from what's really going on.

This weeks focus will be about balance and about embracing all the truths that come with this crazy life.

Have a great start to your week! How will you create balance?

1 comment:

  1. Hey BP -- How great that you're able to see your way clear of that tunnel of expectations to experience all the great country that tunnel's passing through! Best of luck in your new job.